Itty Bitty Supernatural Puckleberry
by aingeals-wings
Summary: Drabbles that have evolved into a mini-series of stories about Itty Bitty Supernatural Puckleberry & co.
1. Chapter 1

This is a weird drabble-thing that popped into my mind one day at work. So I took time out of my-really not-busy day and wrote it.

**Reviews would make my day, and if you can't be pleasant at least be polite. Please.**

**Criticism, as long as it's constructive will be-grudgingly-taken on board**

**Oh yeah; and the characters don't belong to me. But if Ryan Murphy wants to give me Puck, I'll be happy to take him...in **_**any**_** way. lol**

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Rachel hopped out of the car and skipped across the playground ahead of her guardians. Her senses scoured the area until she found who she was looking for, and she weaved her way towards the kindergarten teacher

"Hello Ms French, I'm Rachel and I'm new" she smiled brightly up at the teacher, her wings fluttering, the tips shimmering yellow/orange

"Hello Rachel" Ms French smiled softly "where are your parents?"

"I don't know" Rachel frowned and her wing tips turned blue momentarily "but my guardians are there!" she pointed behind her where a group of four suited agents were making their way across the playground, three of them on their cell phones "they're like my parents I guess" her wings were tipped with yellow once more, and Ms French opened her mouth to ask why they changed colour when a little boy bounded over, fangs flashing, ignoring his mother five feet away telling him to 'put his teeth _away_!'

"Hello vampire" Rachel turned to him with a bright smile and her wing tips turned lilac/rose

"Fairy?" he tilted his head "how come you have fairy wings if you aren't a fairy?" Ms French gaped at the five year olds-how did they…how were they so _advanced_?

"I like to fly" Rachel beamed at him "and I can't control my teleporting yet. You're super pretty"

"I'm not pretty" the vampire scowled "I'm badass"

"OK" Rachel shrugged "then you're super badass. My name's Rachel. What's yours?"

"Puck" he stuck his hand out, but when Rachel placed her tiny hand in his, they didn't shake, he linked their fingers and tugged her to his side "you're mine" he told her firmly

"OK" Rachel agreed happily

"Well done Rachel" one of the agents nodding approvingly at the boy by her side before turning to the teacher and handing over a blackberry and reeling off a list of instructions that Ms French understood…none of

"It's ok" Rachel piped up "I know all the rules anyway"

"I don't like rules" Puck informed them

"Neither does Rachel" the only female agent looks down at them amusedly "I think we're going to have our hands full with you two"

"You make such a beautiful couple" Puck's mother gazed at the two supernatural beings and blinked back tears "my little boy is growing up"

"He's only five" Rachel rolled her eyes "and he's gonna live _forever._ Five is nothing"

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"Are you ok?" Rachel picked Puck's bruised hand up carefully and kissed the scraped knuckles. The scrapes disappeared almost instantly and Rachel smiled shyly up at her protector

"It didn't hurt anyway" Puck shrugged it off "and they better know better than to try and hurt you now. Or I'll eat them" he scowled round at the rest of the room

"And I'll hide the bodies" Rachel promised "you know…" she bit her lip "since you protected me and all…I should thank you" she pressed her lips to his cheek suddenly "thank you" she blushed, and the tips of her folded wings burnt bright pink. Puck grinned at her and turned her face to his, pressing his lips to hers in a _proper_, if chaste kiss

"I told you" he took her hand "you're mine"

"Yes I am" Rachel scooted even closer to him "one day, you can Claim me, if you like" she looked up at him through her lashes bashfully

"Like…today?" his eyes lit up and his fangs elongated

"Ok" she agreed instantly "but…not here and right now; we have to do it in private"

At lunchtime, when she went to cheat to jump to the front of the queue-it was pie day and everybody knew how much Puck loved pie day-he pulled her back with a secret smile

"Now it's private" he explained once they were alone

"I'll get you some pie anyway" Rachel promised, suppressing her giggles as he led her to the story corner, and sat on the comfy chair there

"It might hurt" he warned "but I'll be gentle. Promise"

"It won't hurt" Rachel informed him confidently "I read that when you do it right, a bite can make you _orgasm_"

"Orgasm?" Puck looked nonplussed

"Well I don't know what that is" Rachel admitted "but Sara" her female minder "said '_yeah_ it can' and looked all dreamy, so I asked her and she said it's a _super_ good feeling, but she was embarrassed, so that's why we have to do it in private"

"Ok. Are you ready?" Puck shifted her on his lap so he had easy access to her neck "where do you want my bite?"

"Wherever you want it" she replied instantly, tilting her head to help him

"Right….here" Puck pressed a soft kiss to the base of her neck, almost at her collarbone "ready?" he checked again. Rachel turned her head back to look at him, and traced his fangs with a finger

"Your fang-face is super-badass too" she sighed softly "I'm ready" she turned again and tilted her head for maximum access. His little arms came around her, easily holding her much smaller body, and he lowered his mouth to her neck, scraping his teeth along her collar bone before pressing his fangs in, watching in awe as the skin bowed, then broke, and Rachel's life force flowed into his mouth. And _wow_ it was even better than the human stuff his dad sneaked him on special occasions. He gulped at it eagerly, pulling back when she suddenly pinched him. _Hard_.

"What?" he demanded, his mouth coated in blood

"You're meant to be _claiming_ me" she pouted "not _draining_ me"

"Sorry" he looked guilty "you taste _epic_"

"Because I'm super-powerful" Rachel smiled smugly "now, claim me-and don't drink too much more. Please"

"I won't" Puck promised. He licked excess blood from around his mouth, then lapped at the drops that seeped from the rapidly-healing wound on her neck "did it hurt?" he wondered

"No" Rachel sighed "I think I probably had an orgasm. It was super-nice"

"Awesome" Puck nodded, then carefully slid his fangs back into her neck "_Mine_" he growled round a mouthful of blood

"Yours" Rachel agreed, gasping when there was an audible _snap_ and suddenly, she could taste her own blood trickling down her throat. And it tasted _good_.

"_Wow_" Puck licked the wounds to stop blood flow then turned bright eyes on his newly-claimed Mate "that's _so_ cool"

"I could taste my blood" Rachel told him

"I know! I could feel my fangs in your neck" he wiped a hand over his mouth to get any last forgotten drops of blood and slurped them happily "so…you're mine forever now, right?"

"Yup" Rachel beamed proudly "forever and ever"

"Cool" Puck nudged her to her feet and took her hand "you feel ok?" she nodded "we'll get some more lunch to keep you strong, and from now on, can I have your blood rather than the stuff mom gives me?"

"Sure" Rachel shrugged "my blood is super-strong and it will make you even stronger-er" she informed him knowledgably

"Awesome" Puck smirked "then I can beat _anybody_ up-and keep you safe"

"Since we're basically married now" Rachel frowned "we should live together"

"And we have to share a bed" Puck added "my mom and dad do"

"Sara and Roger share a bed" Rachel confided "I'm not supposed to disturb them when they sleepover together unless it's life-or-death…or Liam shows up"

"Mom and dad are like that" Puck nodded "they have 'adult time' but now we can have 'married time' when they're being stupid and grownup"

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"Where's Rachel?" Ms French looked up from her book to be faced with two agents

"I-" she glanced around the playground then sighed "she'll be with young Puckerman, no doubt raising merry hell somewhere"

"Hopefully not literally" Sara muttered "I'll take the classrooms" she told Andy

"I've got the communal areas and the grounds" he nodded and they split up, jogging off in opposite directions.

Andy cleared the upper level and was scouring the cafeteria when Sara called him to Rachel's classroom

"What's-" he broke off and stared at their six year old charge, sitting in the lap of the Puckerman vampire, his fangs buried in her neck

"He claimed her" Sara whispered "I don't know whether to gush, laugh or cry"

"When Liam finds out?" Andy muttered

"Warner will have to check the kid out" Sara nodded "but gods, they're so cute-and watch" Puck pulled back from Rachel's neck and licked the claim mark clean of blood, kissing it softly before turning Rachel's face to his and kissing her lips chastely.

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**I don't know if there will ever be more of Itty-Bitty superna****tural Puckleberry, I guess only time will tell.**

**Pleas review! Nicely!**


	2. Meeting the Gleeks

**Oh my god; I'm totally blown away by the response to this!**

**There is more! I'm such a review-whore. Oh god; that rhymed. Ick.**

**Anyway, I'm so easy; people pleaded for more so I sat at work-heh-and waited for inspiration to hit. Most people wanted them to meet the rest of the Gleeks, so here be their meeting. I'm also thinking about doing some set in high school, one where the Gleeks are supernatural and one when they aren't...If anybody has any scenario ideas let me know and I'll do my best to do them justice. I don't think this is as good as the first one, and it's also not beta'd. But I did run it through spell check on Word, so can I claim mistakes are Bill Gates'? No? Never mind. Let me know what you think-but only if its good or indifferent. Heh.**

**Glee does not belong to me, blah blah blah...but Ryan Murphy hasn't claimed Itty-Bitty Vamp-Puck, so can I have him? Please?**

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"A special school?" Rachel looked distrustfully up at her guardians "and I'll be safe there?"

"Much safer than your last school" Liam nodded

"And Puck will be there?" she checked. The three adults exchanged looks

"Well…no" Liam admitted "but you can still see him on weekends"

"But it was Puck that saved me from the bad guys" Rachel glared at Liam, her wing tips turning red

"It's…very expensive" Sara explained "and now that Puck's mommy has a new baby, and his daddy left…" she trailed off

"Well if Puck isn't there, I'm not going. I'm not going anywhere without my Mate" Rachel crossed her arms and stomped her foot "no way"

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"Why don't we just not go to school?" Puck suggested on the way to their first day at the new, _safer_ school for exclusively supernatural and preternatural children "we could learn at your place, and have loads of recess. That's my favourite lesson"

"Well you might just like it here, Vampire" Liam told him "you'll be taught to hone and control your power"

"Home my power?" Puck echoed confusedly "that sounds stupid"

"_Hone_" Rachel corrected with a giggle "it means…" her eyes unfocused "to make more acute or effective; improve; perfect" she recited

"I don't need to go to school" Puck squeezed her hand and looked at Liam "I have Rachel and she can find out everything we're ever going to need to know"

"You'll need to learn things that aren't in the books in our library one day" Liam told him patiently "you need to make friends interact with other species, make allies…"

"Friends?" Puck eyed him suspiciously "why would I need more friends? I have Rachel"

"And I have Puck" Rachel piped up

"And we don't need anybody else" Puck scowled "remember our _last_ new friend?"

"That was very…unfortunate, and I promise that will never happen again" Liam struggled to keep him animal form at bay as his irritation rose at the rude young vampire

"He tried to kill _my_ Rachel" Puck pressed "and then _I_ had to save the day and bite him. And he tasted _gross_"

"Then _don't_ make friends" Liam found himself _glaring_ at a _six year old_. He'd never felt so belittled

"We won't" Puck smiled smugly. Rachel was _his_ and his alone-she had the bite mark to prove it. He wasn't going to share her with other people who wanted her to be _their_ friend.

"Oh thank god" Liam glanced out of the window "we're here" he didn't even wait for the driver to open the door; he leaped out and breathed in fresh, calming air deeply. Rachel and Puck watched him interestedly, climbed out after him and started copying. The driver turned firmly away and hid his laugh with a cough. Liam glowered at him then at the kids, who blinked up at him innocently. He just _knew_ they knew what they were doing to him. And they were enjoying it. The brats.

"Inside" he growled at them, pointing firmly across an empty playground to a sparkling white/silver doorway. Rachel grabbed Puck's hand and went to skip across the space, but Puck refused to do such a _girly_ thing, and ran at full speed instead. Rachel giggled and fluttered her wings, hovering alongside Puck, letting him pull her at his supernatural pace. They crashed-literally-through the sparkling door, and landed in a heap, jumping to their feet just as Liam joined them, growling in a decidedly _in_human way under his breath. Obviously recognising they'd gone too far, the two children held hands and looked at the floor contritely

"Aw, aren't they adorable!" before Liam could snap at them, a smiling wood-fairy arrived and dropped to her knees to talk to the children face to face. Liam's eyes flickered feral gold. They'd sensed her too? And he'd thought they were being apologetic. Ha-they were sending him to an early grave

"You must be Noah and Rachel"

"Puck" they corrected together

"Puck and Rachel" Rachel held out her free hand "I'm Rachel, and it's a pleasure to meet you" she smiled brightly "Are you our new teacher?"

"Oh wow" the woman melted completely in the face of the tiny girl's beautiful manners, and shook the offered hand "No darling I'm not your teacher; I'm the headmistress here, my name is Tania, but you must call me Mrs Willow"

"Because you're a wood fairy" Rachel giggled "Willow" she nodded

"That's right" Mrs Willow smiled at her "I chose that name myself because Willow's are my favourite type of tree" she turned her smile on Puck who was eyeing her suspiciously "I thought your name was Noah"

"It was" he shrugged "but Puck is more badass. Only Rachel is ever allowed to call me Noah"

"And only when we're alone" Rachel confirmed

"Puck is fine, but you must watch your language-'badass' is not an acceptable term for six year olds to be airing"

"But it's ok for adults?" Rachel frowned "that isn't fair. And Puck _is_ badass. He saved me from the evil demon who was pretending to be a boy"

"I bit him" Puck smirked then made a face "but he tasted _gross_"

"Just-don't say it, ok kids?" Liam sighed

"OK Liam" they chorused with matching innocent smiles. He groaned inwardly-that could only mean trouble

"We won't say…_it_" Rachel promised, her eyes twinkling. Liam eyed her bright yellow glittering wing tips. That _definitely_ meant trouble

"Excellent; I think you'll settle in and do very well here; the both of you" Mrs Willow beamed at them "I'm sorry; I tend to focus just on my students when they are around. Would you like to come along with us to the classroom Mr…" she looked at Liam

"Just Liam" he shook her hand briefly "and yes I will-a brief personal security check"

"I understand" Mrs Willow offered her hands to Rachel and Puck but they looked up at her, then at their joined hands "You're very good friends, aren't you?" she laughed

"Rachel's my Mate. I Claimed her; we're way more than _friends_" Puck informed her derisively

"Claimed her?" Mrs Willow looked at him, then up at Liam who confirmed with a sharp nod

"See?" Rachel pulled back the neckline of her summer dress to display neat, twin puncture holes just above her collar bone

"That's…unusual" Mrs Willow said finally

"Special. Not unusual; special" Rachel corrected her

"Because we're special" Puck confirmed

"The classroom, ma'am?" Liam prompted when the headmistress continued to stare in disbelief at the mated pair. She thought she'd seen it all, looking after young gifted preternaturals…apparently not so.

"Oh yes; excuse me" she shook her head "I was just-wow; Mated at six years old" she rose a slightly accusatory eyebrow at Liam

"They did it themselves" he told her stiffly "I would not align my _six year old_ charge to _anybody_ for eternity by choice"

"I knew she was mine" Puck spoke up, looking between the adults

"And I knew I was his" Rachel added "shall we go to our classroom now?"

"Of course; this way children" Mrs Willow managed a smile, and then led them down the main corridor

"These halls are huge" Rachel whispered to Puck "perfect for flying practice"

"I'm afraid not Rachel" Mrs Willow shook her head, glancing back at the pair "no flying inside unless you are in the gym and have permission"

Rachel and Puck exchanged looks. That wasn't going to work for them…

"Just try not to get caught" Liam murmured as they stopped outside a small classroom with 'Mr Schuester' on the door, with a list of the abilities/species of the children in the class

"We'll add your names after your first assessment" Mrs Willow told them, knocking on the door

"Finn, would you get the door please?" a voice requested from inside

"Sure Mr Schue!" the door flew open to reveal a slightly podgy, tall boy who beamed up at Mrs Willow

"Hi Mrs Willow! Wow" he caught sight of the two children "I like your wings" he told Rachel shyly

"Thank you" she smiled politely

"I'm Finn" he smiled bashfully at her

"My name is Rachel" she offered her hand, but Puck hauled her back and growled at the other boy, his fangs elongating "Puck?" she turned to him with a frown

"Oh dear" Mrs Willow murmured

"You can say that again" Liam sighed "the last boy who tried that ended up dead. He was a demon, but still…"

"Well, you must be my new students" they were joined at the door by the teacher "there's no need to ask what you are" he looked at Puck's fangs "and you…must be a fairy-you have beautiful wings" he complimented Rachel

"I'm not a fairy" she informed him tightly "my wings _change colour_" the tips were turning red "see? Fairies can't do that"

"Fairies are lame" Puck announced "Rachel's way better than any lame fairy. She just likes to fly" Rachel nodded her confirmation

"They're uh…_special_" Mrs Willow told Mr Schuester as Liam herded the pair through the door-pushing a hissing Puck quickly past the cowering boy who'd answered the door

"W-_wow_" an Asian girl approached them shyly "you're wings are s-super pretty"

"I know" Rachel preened; fluttering the now-orange tips flashily "what are you?"

"A cat" Puck reported

"Y-yeah" the girl gave him a wide-eyed stare "how did you know?"

"You smell" he told her with a smirk

"Oh" her eyes went downcast

"He meant by your scent" Rachel comforted her, frowning at Puck, who rolled his eyes and looked around for Liam, who was taking details on the rest of the children. There was only eleven of them, and they smelled pretty boring; two wolves, a wizard, a soothsayer and a Drow made up the boys-and the one who'd answered the door smelt half giant, then the girls; the cat, a witch, a half-angel, a siren and a harpy.

"I'm going now" Liam told them "Someone-probably Sara and or Roger-will be here at three thirty to pick you up. Try not to get into _too_ much trouble" he looked pointedly at Puck, who shrugged unrepentantly

"As long as they all stay away from Rachel they'll be fine" he reasoned

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_Because I can't be bothered to write long introductions: Mike & Matt-Werewolves, Finn-Half-Giant, Artie-wizard, Kurt-Soothsayer, Sam-Drow._

_And the girls: Tina-cat-shifter, Quinn-siren, Brittany-half-angel, Santana-Harpy, Mercedes-witch_

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"What do you know about other species and abilities?" Mr Schuester asked interestedly as he gathered everybody for a 'welcome session'

"I know what everybody here is" Puck told him "because they all stink" he smirked and all the girls looked insulted. The boys looked secretly pleased

"I can tell what _species_ people are" Rachel told him "but not any individual powers"

"I know giants are huge and dumb and if you touch Rachel I'm going to bite you" Puck snapped his teeth threateningly at Finn, who was edging closer to_ his_ Rachel

"Finn's just being friendly Puck" Mr Schuester soothed "aren't you here to make new friends?"

"Nope" Puck smirked

"Liam told us not too" Rachel confirmed "because the last person that tried to be my friend was evil so Puck had to bite him"

"And I _don't_ mind biting again" he glared warningly at Finn

"I'm sure Liam didn't mean you not to make friends" Mr Schuester laughed

"Then why did he _say_ not to?" Puck challenged rudely

"I'm starting to understand" Mr Schuester muttered to himself "ok" he said aloud "I won't force you to make friends, but I do insist you don't intimidate your classmates. You'll be spending a lot of time together, and nobody in here is evil"

"How do you know?" Rachel questioned

"The silver door you came through to get into school has a protection ward on; it doesn't let in anyone who wishes to do others harm"

"So Puck won't really bite me?" Finn asked eagerly, shifting until he was sitting right at Rachel's feet

"Oh, I will" Puck flashed his fangs and moved himself between Rachel and Finn

"He didn't mean any harm when he entered the building" Mr Schuester clarified "but I still won't let him bite you"

"Try and stop me" Puck snorted

"He's super fast" Rachel smiled at her Mate adoringly

"You won't bite anybody here, Puck it isn't allowed, and Finn is _only being friendly_"

"He can go _be friendly_ to someone else" Puck hugged Rachel to himself protectively "and I have to bite Rachel, so I'll bite someone every day"

"You bite Rachel?" Mr Schuester asked concernedly

"I Claimed her" Puck said slowly "Mrs Willow told you, I heard her"

"I thought she meant metaphorically-uh, not literally" he explained at Puck's confused look

"She meant literally-see?" Rachel pulled back the collar of her dress with a smile to reveal the bite mark and Mr Schuester gaped at it

"You really-she-bite-" he blinked "you're _Mated_ at six years old?"

"Why does everyone ask that?" Rachel frowned "yes, we are; I knew I was Puck's"

"And I knew she was mine, so I Claimed her" Puck shrugged "not too confusing to me"

"Or me" Rachel agreed

"So…are you going to get married?" Quinn asked eagerly

"No" Puck looked disgusted "do I look like a _girl_?"

"Yes we _are_" Rachel pouted at him

"We don't need to get married" Puck told her "we're Mated. That's way better"

"We can do your wedding" Quinn told Rachel excitedly "I got married last week, to Sam" the blonde boy next to her waved obediently when ordered then went back to his talk with the werewolf on his other side

"OK!" Rachel agreed happily

"Great" Quinn jumped up "now you and Puck aren't allowed to see each other again until the wedding" she held her hand out for Rachel to take

"Hell no" Puck shook his head, tightening his grip on Rachel

"It's tra…something" Quinn shook her head

"Traditional" Mr Schuester corrected quietly

"_Tra-dit-ion-al_" Quinn enunciated "so you have to stay away, with the boys and Rachel stays with the girls"

"_Only_ girls?" Puck looked sharply at Finn

"Only girls" Quinn nodded

"They'll be just across the room; she won't be out of sight" Mr Schuester promised

"OK" Puck let Quinn tugged Rachel out of his grasp "just for a while" he agreed reluctantly

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**OK, I know that isn't really an end, and I might try working on their cute little wedding-I already have a mini-plan for it, but that's where my inspiration stopped, so that's what I've given you. Constructive criticism will be more than welcome; I'm not wholly happy with the flowing-ness of this but it wouldn't fix itself, so it is how it is. And if you want more, I will keep trying. But it's still marked as complete, and I can't make any promises.**

**Oh! Also, a Drow is from Scottish legends, I didn't know what to make Sam but I knew I wanted him in it, so I looked through mythological creatures and liked the sound of it; 'an elf-like creature in Scottish folklore which lived in caves and forged magical metal work'**

**If I do more, I will try to incorporate more of the Gleeks powers into it...and, you know, actually mention them all.**

**I couldn't resist putting Santana as a harpy, lol...it's totally what she'd be in 'real' life if they were supernatural beings**


	3. Itty Bitty Puckleberry: The Wedding

**This follows on from the last one-this is Itty Bitty Puckleberry: The Wedding**

**I am working on more but I'm still leaving it as marked complete because I'm too lazy to change it. Heh**

**Please review! Tell me how much you like it...or how much you don't. But don't be mean. Please.**

**The characters do not belong to me...etc etc**

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"I've never seen a vampire before-you have cool teeth" Matt spoke up "ours are _better-_"

"Are not" Puck snorted

"-but we can only show them when we change, so I guess yours are kind of…cooler"

"Badass" Puck corrected him "mine are more _badass_"

"Badass?" Matt echoed "Cool!"

"It's time for the wedding" Santana barged into the boys group, splitting them up and pushing them to where Mercedes and Tina had set up the 'church'-the chairs in two rows "Who is your bridesmaid-um, best man?" she asked Puck

"I am!" Matt rushed to his side "'cause we both have _badass_ teeth"

"Language boys" Mr Schuester frowned

They all ignored the teacher. Quinn directed the boys into their seats then skipped to the back of their 'aisle' to stand beside Rachel for the bridal procession

"You two get to the front" Santana pushed Matt and Puck towards Brittany who, as the holiest figure in the class, was chosen as the ceremony officiator, with Tina by her side to prompt her lines if she forgot them

"Are you ready?" Quinn asked Rachel

"Almost" Rachel frowned "I need a wedding dress like a princesses..." she closed her eyes tight and Quinn gasped as her pretty dress transformed into a white ball gown

"Cinderella's dress" Quinn reached out to touch the skirt reverently "_wow_. Can you do that to me?"

"I don't think so" Rachel sighed "I tried to change Puck's clothes into the prince's outfit but that didn't work" she pouted

"Oh" Quinn looked disappointed "ok...shall we start then?" she looked expectantly at Mr Schuester, who obligingly pointed at the CD player in the corner, and the wedding march started. The kids giggled excitedly then settled as Santana hissed warningly at them.

Quinn cleared her throat delicately and once everyone's focus was on her, she started down the aisle, beckoning Rachel to follow her after a few steps. The girls gasped at the dress and stared, awed at their new classmate whose eyes were firmly on her soon-to-be husband who was fidgeting next to Matt, just in front of Brittany. Quinn moved to one side when she reached the front and Rachel stepped up to Puck, taking his hand with a beaming smile

"Stand _still_" she hissed through her toothy grin. Puck sighed, but made a conscious effort to stop moving. Rachel squeezed his hand and smiled approvingly before turning to Brittany

"You may start" she told the half-angel magnanimously

"Good" Brittany beamed, her halo shimmering bright white momentarily before turning back to gold and her wings unfolded from her back to whispers from her classmates-it was rare they had an appearance from the beautiful feathered appendages; Mr Schuester frowned on using their powers or abilities during class time

"Dearly beloved" she flung her arms out theatrically

"Belov_ed_" Mr Schuester corrected softly

"Dearly belove-_ed_" Brittany restarted, frowning at Mr Schuester-you weren't supposed to interrupt weddings! "We are here today to get Rachel and Puck married" she broke off as the class applauded enthusiastically. Apart from Finn, who stood with a determined look on his face

"I object!" he announced firmly. Puck growled and Rachel grabbed his other hand too, clutching them both with every iota of her supernatural power

"No you don't" Santana's eagle wings came out to flutter warningly. Finn gulped, but turned back to the front, keeping half an eye on the harpy

"I _do_ object" he said stubbornly

Mr Schuester sighed "Finn you can't-_Puck!_" the vampire had broken free of Rachel's restrictive grip, and he pounced on the bigger boy, his supernatural strength and momentum allowing him to knock the half-giant over. His fangs flashed near Finn's terrified face and then zeroed in lower to his neck

"You wanna take that back, dopey?" Puck snarled through his fangs

"Noah!" Rachel marched over and tried to move between the two boys "I don't want you biting anyone but _me_" she protested as his razor-sharp fangs dragged slowly down the column of Finn's thick neck. Mr Schuester watched in horror. He'd tried to part the boys with telekinesis, but they'd proved resistant to his attempts

Rachel stomped her foot furiously

"This is _my_ wedding. Stop showing me up!" she shouted at the boys

"Who's Noah?" Matt whispered to Mike, who shook his head cluelessly, his eyes glued to the two boys in the middle of the scattered chairs

Santana stepped forward, her wings fluttering, ready for action

"I'll get Puck; can you move Finn?" Rachel asked the harpy

"Yeah" Santana grinned "and I know exactly where to dump him" at Rachel's nod, both girls stepped forward and Rachel wrapped her wings and arms around Puck from behind him, tugging him away and Santana swooped in, grabbed Finn with her talons that had replaced her feet and flew out of the nearest window, ignoring Mr Schuester's renewed shouts.

Rachel held Puck in the cocoon of her wings till he stopped struggling, and when Santana returned a few minutes later-sans Finn-Puck and Rachel were once again standing together at the front. Puck looked sulky, but his fangs had receded, and Rachel was beaming again. The chairs had been righted and Santana landed neatly at the back, her feet and shoes replacing her talons and her wings folding up out of sight

"Where is Finn, Santana?" Mr Schuester groaned, rubbing at his throbbing temples

"Out of the way" the Latina skipped to her chair "you can carry on now Britt, Finn won't interrupt again"

"Good" the half-angel beamed at the betrothed couple "Puck, will you marry Rachel?" Tina leaned over and whispered quickly "oh-I mean, do you take Rachel as your wife?"

"Yes" Puck answered sullenly

"_Puck_" Rachel's lower lip trembled

"I do" he answered more pleasantly, squeezing Rachel's hand and giving her his brightest smile. The lower lip stopped immediately and she beamed. His eyes narrowed suspiciously, but Brittany hurried on before he could say anything more

"And Rachel, do you take Puck as your husband?"

"I do" she answered primly, her wing tips fluttering lilac

"OK!" Brittany skipped from foot to foot "then you're married! Yay!" she giggled "Now you have to _kiss_" the rest of the class tittered and Mr Schuester opened his mouth to finish the ceremony, but Puck and Rachel leaned towards each other and their lips met in an innocent kiss that they held for a few seconds as the girls giggled and the boys gagged. Mr Schuester dropped his head into his hands and admitted defeat

"Now cake!" Brittany tugged Rachel away from Puck's mouth and pointed to where the girls had piled the contents of the snack cupboard into a mountain of junk food and stuck glitter-covered figures of two people on top-one figure had fangs, the other wings. Other than that, they were identical stick people

"No-_rings_" Quinn turned expectantly to _her_ husband, who looked blank. She crossed her arms, scowled and tapped her foot

"I just need a bit of metal" Sam gulped nervously. Matt and Mike found a handful of paperclips and handed them over with an apologetic shrug-for some reason, their classroom seemed to be filled with solid plastic or wooden items "this will be fine" Sam assured them, keeping half an eye on his scary wife as he melted the metal in his hands, parted the resulting blob into two pieces and beckoned the newlyweds forward, manipulating the metal into ring shapes and dropping them in the waiting palms. Rachel examined the one in her hand-for Puck-with a frown. It wasn't as shiny as she'd anticipated her wedding ring would be...but she slid it on Puck's hand anyway then held her left hand out expectantly Puck looked at the tiny roll of metal in his hand and shrugged, shoving the band onto Rachel's tiny hand

"Now can we have cake?" he asked his wife eagerly

"I _suppose_ so" she eyed him "as long as..."

"I won't bite anybody but you" he promised mulishly

"Then we can have cake now" Rachel grabbed his hand and dragged him over, only to stop short. Half of the pile of food was gone. Puck growled and Rachel gaped, bewildered-it had been there just a couple of minutes ago! "What happened to our cake?" she asked. Everybody else's eyes turned to Santana, who shifted guiltily

"It wasn't me?" she tried innocently

"Then why are there crumbs on your shirt?" Mercedes asked her archly

"Fine, it _was_ me" Santana scowled "but you should all know better! Don't put food out for other people around me! It's like my _job_ to steal food"

"But it was _my_ food" Puck scowled "so where is it?" he stalked forward and pawed through the messy remains "you better not have-oh, pie!" he fished out a piece of pie and stuffed it in his mouth, continuing to attempt talking through the pastry. Rachel wrinkled her nose and slapped a napkin over his gaping mouth

"_Chew_, Puck" she ordered "and don't talk with your mouth full" he rolled his eyes but obeyed, moving to block the rest of their 'guests' from getting to the remaining food when Matt started forward, sniffing eagerly.

"Where _did_ you put Finn?" Rachel asked Santana quietly. Not quietly enough; Puck growled at the mention of his name and Rachel quickly shoved another piece of pie at him, the distraction working a treat

"The older kids did a performance of Jack and the Beanstalk last year" Santana grinned "and the props are just left lying around...so now we have a real-half-giant at the top of the beanstalk" the kids all laughed and Mr Schuester headed off to the drama storage room to fetch the boy, hoping the unattended kids wouldn't blow up the classroom while he was gone

"Oh, and did I mention" Santana added innocently once Mr Schuester was out of earshot "that the beanstalk was moved to the outside field a couple of days ago as part of a prank...and Finn is afraid of heights?"

* * *

**And there is that; the Itty Bitty Puckleberry: The Wedding. Loads of people have this collection on alert so I really hope you all enjoy it-and I don't mind shamelessly begging you tell me how much you dO-or don't! Like it. Please? Pretty please?**

**Up next-late time next week I think [hope]-we should be seeing the Itty Bitty Gleeks at Sports Day, where I hope to feature a guest appearance by one Sue Sylvester...**

**And I've finally decided what Rachel is btw; I know I haven't said, other than '**_**not**_** a fairy' and I may work that in somewhere...**


	4. Itty Bitty Sports Day

**I'm on Glee strike.**

**I know I'm late updating; I'm an awful person but I got a bit stuck with this one-sorry!**

**Yeah, anyway-I'm on strike-from watching. Lauren? Really? I'm sure the actress is a **_**lovely person**_**, but is Mark being punished for something? The whole juvie bit when no-one wants to tell us **_**really**_** why he skipped episodes; yeah, I heard it was to give Quinn & Sam a chance…but they only mentioned Puck & Quinn together in ****one line**** in the first episode, and it was Jewfro that mentioned it! Then Sam mentioned being scared after he kissed Quinn, but it wasn't mentioned when Puck got back! And regardless of what Mark says, it is NOT normal for stars to take odd breaks in filming unless there's funding issues and since they blew millions on the-awesome!- superbowl ep [how good was Need You Now?] I'm thinking that isn't it. Or if they're pregnant...and I'm thinking that isn't it either.**

**So I'll be depending on ffics and reviews to let me know when it's safe to watch again. I don't mind Puck/Other in the show [ok, I mind it **_**a lot**_**, but I accept it because I like most of the other female characters] but Lauren/Puck? Is a huge turn-off. Apologies to a-anyone who likes Lauren/Puck [although why are you reading Puckleberry if you do?] and b-for the massive AN.**

**Also-somebody asked for a list of who is who/who can do what but I did put that in part way through ch2 just as a quick list because I'm super-lazy and couldn't be bothered to do long introductions**

**Glee is mine, yeah, which is why I've paired my favourite character with someone I **_**despise**_**. Sarcasm got through? Good.**

**Any mistakes are mine; this is not beta'd. Feel free to point any out; I hate mis-prints and I'll fix them**

**Oh yeah-and thank you to those of you who **_**have**_** reviewed. It makes me smile. And I need **_**something**_** to make me happy now. though a half-naked Damon on Vampire Diaries last night worked pretty well too :p**

**Sorry for anyone who actually read all that and though 'WTF?'**

**Let's get on with the story:**

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"Sports Day?" Liam repeated, looking between the two youngsters "isn't that a little unfair on people with undeveloped abilities?"

"That's what I said" Puck told him seriously "I don't wanna be on a team with losers who can only levitate or some lame sh-"

"Language" Liam growled

"Some lame _shuper_ power?" Puck offered with a grin. Liam scowled and the two kids giggled

"But its ok Liam" Rachel spoke up "after Puck told the teachers he wasn't going to be in a team of losers-"

"You said that to the teachers?" Liam demanded "wait-_why_ am I surprised?" he sighed "so I can expect _another_ home visit from Mrs Willow"

"If she didn't have so many _stupid_ rules, I wouldn't be in trouble all the time" Puck pointed out

"That's true" Rachel nodded "Everybody knows Puck gets to bite me, but it doesn't stop them telling him off" she gave Liam her best adorable pout "cant you _talk_ to them about it?"

"I _have_, Rachel" Liam's eye twitched as he tried to maintain his cool-and his human form "and they don't have a problem with Puck biting you. They have a _problem_ when he bites you in the playground and _charges_ other kids to watch"

"Mom doesn't give me an allowance anymore" Puck sulked "I have to get money _some_how"

"What do _you_ need money for?" Liam asked "wait-" he held up a hand "forget I asked; I don't want to know, and I don't care"

"ANYWAY" Rachel stomped her foot "my story, remember? _After_ Puck told the teachers he didn't want us to be in a loser team, the senior class teacher came over and congratulated us for not being '_good-for-nothing communists who listen blindly to the teachings of a man who is bird-brained seeing as his hair is in fact just a nest for droppings in the form of hair gel_' and then she asked us what we could do"

"A t_eacher_ said that?" Liam blinked at her. Rachel didn't lie, but…really?

"She's awesome" Puck smirked

"She recognised Puck was a Master Vampire, then asked me what I was, because she was sure I wasn't just a fairy and so I told her I was half-elf"

"You…didn't tell her what your _other_ half is…did you?" Liam asked worriedly

"No, just that it made me _even more _super-powerful" Rachel assured him

"And when I showed her what I could do by knocking a creepy kid across the playground with one punch, she invited us to join her team for sports day!" Puck told him excitedly

"And she said she always wins Sports Days" Rachel added "because she only lets winners into her team, and we all know-well, _we_ three know-I _can't_ lose!"

"You _probably _can't-remember you're half elf too-we don't know how much of your power came from your father"

"I've never lost before" Rachel frowned

"You've not _done_ anything before" Liam told her "just…you may _not_ have inherited your father's power, so you may have to depend wholly on your known power"

"That's ok, you're still the most powerful person there" Puck comforted her "and if anyone says otherwise I'll beat them up"

* * *

"I hope you're all ready to do whatever it takes to win, Team Sue" Sue Sylvester paced up and down in front of her hand-picked team. The two powerful midgets she'd taken from kindergarten, then the best child from every other class. She was _going_ to win. Or they'd _pay_. "We can lie, cheat and steal as long as you cross your finishing lines before everybody else. _That_ is the objective. Fail me, and you fail _life_; you'll be thrown out of school, be disowned by your parents, shunned by the local community and mocked by the _world_. So, what are we going to do?"

"Win!" her team shouted back

"I can't _hear_ you!" She yelled "_what_ are we going to do?"

"WIN!"

"Good. Stay away from your competitors, they'll try and lull you into a false sense of security, pretending to be your friend, then they'll poison your drink, murder your gullible selves and dump your decomposing body on the front lawn of your house" she was pleased to see most of her team looked terrified. The two midgets though, looked intrigued

"Can I do that to _them_ instead?" Boy-midget asked, flashing his fangs

"I like you, boy-midget" Sue bestowed a glimmer of a smile on him "do you have a name?"

"Puck"

"Puck" Sue nodded "I suppose that will be acceptable until I come up with a suitable alternative. And you, girl-midget, your name?"

"Rachel" she smiled prettily

"I don't like that" Sue shook her head "far too…_human_. What do you think of…Sue Jr?"

"I like Rachel" she worried her bottom lip with her teeth

"Don't do that" Puck nudged her "only I'm allowed to bite you"

"I will call you Sue Jr" Sue told her "it's an honour I haven't bestowed on anyone before now, but I believe you have the potential to be almost as great as I am"

"I'm still gonna call you Rachel" Puck murmured as Sue marched off to greet Mr Schuester and his team of misfits.

* * *

"Remember" Sue stared down at Rachel "_whatever_ it takes. You get there first, understand?"

Rachel nodded and took her place in the flying race line-up with a shot of apprehension. She didn't have supernatural speed like Puck did, and she was up against an eagle-shifter and a peregrine-shifter, as well as Sam, and Santana, who both had bigger wings than her

_Whatever it takes, whatever it takes, whatever it takes_…

The starting buzzer went and the other four flew off. Rachel screwed her eyes shut and the crowd stared and murmured. Sue looked furious. Then Rachel disappeared, and a proud smile washed over her face. Whatever it took. She glanced to the other end of the field and sure enough, Rachel had broken the finish line tape and was celebrating her win while the other fliers were still half-way through. Sue beckoned her golf cart driver over, and they set off to the finish line to congratulate the winner.

"I'm afraid we can't name you as the winner Rachel" Mrs Willow said sympathetically "you…well, you cheated"

"What?" Sue jumped out of her cart and marched over "she did _not_ cheat and that _is_ another win for Team Sue!"

"It was a _flying_ race, Sue" Will Schuester pointed out with a long-suffering sigh

"No it wasn't" Rachel piped up "it was a race for _fliers _-people with wings"

"Exactly" Sue smirked "excellent, Sue Jr-there's _nothing_ in the rules about flying or not, the only objective was to reach the finish line first"

"And I did" Rachel beamed "I win!" her wing tips shimmered gold

"Everybody else understood it was a flying race" Will pointed out

"No, William, nobody else was smart enough to realise it _wasn't_" Sue returned smugly

"I-unfortunately" Mrs Willow sighed "Sue's right Will, _technically_ we didn't say the contestants _have_ to fly"

"But-"

"Sue Jr wins!" Sue bellowed "put _another_ ten points on my score, score-board child!"

"_However_" Mrs Willow looked at both Sue and Rachel "in future, let's stick with the _spirit_ of the day; it isn't the winning that counts but…" both females looked blankly at her

"The taking part" Will finished obligingly

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard" Sue shook her head in disbelief "and I've watched Williams assessments"

"What?" Will stared at her "they're _confidential_ Sue"

"They _were_" she corrected "I published them on the internet; people have the right to know how stupid their child's teacher is, William"

"So…I won, right?" Rachel looked between the three adults

"Yeah you did" Puck sped over "and I won the pie-eating contest" he told Sue

"Excellent" she smiled triumphantly

"But we don't have-"

"And I bullied the score-board people until they added the ten points"

"-a pie eating contest" Will finished with a sigh

"Ah" Mrs Willow cleared her throat delicately "there _isn't_ a pie-eating contest, Puck"

"Well I ate _all_ of the pie here, and the score-board people gave me ten points" he shrugged "that's a win to me"

"And to me" Sue smiled at her two protégés "come along Puck; Sue Jr, let's rendezvous with the rest of the team"

"But-" Will stared after them "he can't have eaten _all_ of the pie…can he?"

"I sincerely hope not; that included dessert for the students, teachers _and_ parents" Mrs Willow hurried of

* * *

"We won, Liam, we won!" Rachel waved her guardian over to the winner's podium

"You uh, you did" he agreed with a laugh "in some style"

"Because we entered more contests than everyone else" Rachel giggled

"Like pie-eating" Puck grinned "and holding-your-breath"

"I saw" Liam's mouth twitched upwards in the semblance of a smile and both children stared at him in wonder "I was impressed, kids" he admitted "and…more than a little pleased to see other people struggle to control you" he smirked inwardly

"So I do get my father's power then, huh?" Rachel asked Liam

"It certainly looks like it" Liam nodded "although I'm not sure it was needed to win _this_ anyway"

"Conquest would be proud of you" Sue told Rachel, shamelessly eavesdropping on their conversation

"You…_know_ who she is?" Liam gaped at her

"I know _what_ she is" Sue corrected "I met Conquest a few years ago when he wasn't with the other three. I borrowed his horse" Liam cocked a disbelievingly brow

"Borrowed?" he echoed

"He didn't know until I returned it" Sue shrugged unconcernedly "he was _busy_ with an eleven princess, and I believe I'm looking at the result of that 'being busy' right now" she nodded at Rachel "I'm right, aren't I?"

"You met my father?" Rachel stared up at her wide-eyed

"Ah, not really" Sue shook her head "heard he was around without his friends, and I needed transportation" she looked at Liam "I didn't really want to stick around once I'd returned the horse, you know?"

"I understand" he nodded "ah-we will have to ask you to keep this…knowledge to yourself" he said seriously "there are murmurs from both sides about the yin-or-yang of the _result_ of that union" he said pointedly "hence _it_ being in _our_ care"

"I like knowing things nobody else does" Sue considered it "ok. I'll keep schtum" she agreed "for now"

* * *

**And there we leave them again. I hope you enjoyed it, and PLEASE take the time to tell me! **_**Dozens**_** of ****people have this story on alert, but I'm not getting the reviews that tell me you like it. So please? I'm already on strike from **_**watching**_** Glee and I need my inspiration to come from somewhere. So review. Pretty please with chocolate-covered Mark/Puck on top. Wait…let me bask in that image for a second…guh...ok. Please review!**


	5. Puckleberry's Fairy Tale

**As those of you who bothered to read my last-very long-authors note [I'm not offended if you didn't-it's ok] you will have correctly gathered that I was firmly in the 'Anger' stage of the 5 stages of grief. Well, I skipped denial, so I went back and now I'm happily swimming in it. A clip of the EXCELLENT Puckleberry duet 'Need You Now' is bookmarked in my favourites and I'm watching it over and over and over and over... Nothing past that has happened so I'm no longer angry. This is a happy me-which actually meant I was able to get another chapter to you [seriously; I just **_**couldn't**_** in my anger stage]**

**So, sorry for the delay in updating, and thank Need You Now for this chapter.**

**Actually, thank my mother, who gave me the idea while we were walking down the hill...thanks mum! : ]**

**Also, thank you muchly for the fantabulous response to the last chapter; all the reviews made me totally high : ] Please keep it up!**

**Oh! Also-also, some of you realised Rachel's parentage from the semi-subtle clues at the end of the last story/chapter/drabble/whatever but a lot didn't. So: her mother was an Elf, and her father is Conquest, from the four horsemen of the apocalypse. Because I like the four horsemen.**

**I don't own Glee. But if I wasn't firmly in denial, I'd probably be plotting to take it by force and fix it.**

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When his third plea for attention in the form of a poke got Puck a hissed '_stop it_' from Rachel, he rested his elbows on his crossed legs and scowled. Story time was the stupidest thing ever. Apart from the dopey giant sitting behind Rachel and staring worshipfully at her. He was the stupidest thing ever and always would be. It was just that they never read _good_ stories; there was no badass vampires, and only _lame_ fights. The girls all loved them though

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your long hair!" they all chorused along happily with Mr Schuester, who laughed encouragingly and went back to the story. Puck's scowl deepened. Nothing that distracted Rachel from him was good, and these daily stories were the _worst_. Then Rachel always wanted to act them out afterwards. Puck was a badass vampire; he was _not_ cool with pretending to be a wimpy human boy trying to rescue a stupid human _girl_.

"Would you rescue me from a tower if I got kidnapped?" Rachel asked Puck once the story was _finally_ over

"You could just _fly_ out of the window, Rach" he rolled his eyes "and you couldn't _get_ kidnapped; we've got Liam and the rest of the agents and _me_. I wouldn't let anybody kidnap you. Now can we sneak out for early recess?"

She let him drag her out for extra play time, and thankfully stopped talking about the stupid fairy tale.  
If she was a little quieter than usual Puck didn't notice, far too absorbed in the assortment of bugs that Mike and Matt returned to the classroom with after break. He kept half an eye on Rachel, making sure Finn was keeping his distance, but she was scribbling in the corner with Kurt-the only boy that was allowed near her without Puck's supervision-and Quinn. She was probably writing again. It was an art she'd mastered quite recently that she loved and Puck despised. Why would he care about writing? If he wanted to say something, he _said_ it, and if he needed to talk to somebody who wasn't with him...well, the only person he'd ever _need_ to speak to was Rachel, and she was always there when he needed her. In fact, she was always there full stop.

* * *

"Higher!" Rachel shouted "Higher, higher, _higher!_" Puck growled and pushed her with all his strength. She went flying with a yell, her swing finally doing a 360° turn, flipping over the top of the frame "I did it!" she squealed excitedly, jumping off the contraption and hovering momentarily before floating back to the ground "I did it Puck!"

"_I_ did it" he corrected her "with my badass vampire strength"

"It was _my_ swinging that made it go all the way over" Rachel insisted stubbornly

"Whatever" Puck rolled his eyes "it _so_ wasn't" he muttered "Can we get ice cream now?" he asked aloud

"Yes-let's...get far, _far_ away from the playground" Liam shepherded them to the gate and handed them over to Sara to clean their hands and get ice cream. Puck tended to enjoy seeing how far he could push Liam when it came to buying things. Liam didn't appreciate being pushed, Rachel found it amusing and his agents hated it because he took his temper out on them. So when it came to purchases-or anything not directly linked to Rachel's safety, Liam let Sara or one of the other agents take care of them

"What ice cream would you like?" Sara asked as they reached the van, wet wipes disposed of

"We both want two super-huge cones with lots of sauce and sprinkles" Rachel informed her before Puck could start deliberating

"But-"

"That's what I want" Rachel pouted at Puck "don't you want the same thing as me?" she let her eyes fill and Puck's eyes narrowed suspiciously

"Is this girly fake crying?" he checked

"No" Rachel sniffled "you can get something else if you like"

"Nah; I like sauce and sprinkles" Puck shrugged "it's cool"

"Good" she beamed

Sara paid the man and handed the two laden cones to the children

"Ah-how about we sit down and eat those _carefully?_" she suggested

"Why?" Puck stuck his ice cream in his face, pulling back and licking the excess sticky treat from all around his mouth "it's supposed to be messy. Everybody knows that"

"Well between you and me? I don't think Liam got that memo" Sara laughed "and he won't want sticky faces and fingers in the car on the way home, will he?"

"I can lick my hands clean" Puck told her seriously.

"That will just make them stickier" she told him regretfully

"My tongue isn't sticky" Puck frowned "it will _clean_ them"

"I don't want any more" Rachel announced abruptly after cleaning her ice cream of all the sweet sauces and sprinkles

"I'll have it!" Puck snatched it before Sara could open her mouth, and started on the two in earnest

"I need to use the bathroom" Rachel told Sara, nudging her pointedly

"Oh-_oh_, ok-Puck, go and sit with Liam while I take Rachel to the toilet"

"It's ok" Rachel smiled sweetly "the toilet's right there-I won't be out of sight, and I promise I'll come back if there's even anybody else in there"

"OK" Sara agreed slowly "but be careful, ok?"

"I always am!" Rachel skipped off, Puck watching her with half an eye; the rest of his focus on the rapidly melting cones in his hands

"Where's Rachel?" he demanded as he finished the first cone

"It's only been a couple of minutes" Sara soothed "finish your ice cream; I'm sure she'll be back by then"

Puck glared at her and in a fit of temper, threw the second cone across the path "I'm finished-where is she?" he scowled

"Ah-why don't we go back to-" Puck set off at _his_ full speed, straight into the ladies bathroom. The _empty_ ladies bathroom

"RACHEL!" he yelled. He turned on Sara "where is she?" he demanded, his fangs elongated, his eyes pure amber

"I-I don't know" Sara stammered "we...better get back to Liam and the rest"

Puck rushed off, bursting into the group on the edge of the playground

"Sara lost Rachel" he snarled "where is she?"

To his fury, none of them jumped up and went looking or calling for her

"Well _look for her!_" he demanded

"Oh-uh" the three agents surrounding Liam jumped up "we'll-check around" they rushed off and Puck turned his furious eyes to Liam

"Where is she?" he demanded, his eyes flickering between hazel and amber

"Wherever she is-Rachel's fine" he promised "she's strong and powerful"

"Then how has she gone missing?" Puck's fangs disappeared and Liam actually felt his heart soften when the scared face of a six year old looked up at him, wanting answers

"I...don't know" he admitted eventually "but I'm sure we'll get her back"

The agents came back then

"There's no sign" they reported solemnly

"Then look _harder_" Puck's fangs flashed again, his eyes going liquid gold

"I-maybe we should go home" one of them suggested "any contact would be sent-_ow!_" Puck pulled back, licking his fangs while the agent clutched his bloodied leg

"Maybe we shouldn't" Puck suggested dangerously "maybe you should stay here and keep looking"

"Maybe that's a good idea" the agent limped away quickly and Sara tried to hold back her laughter as she headed for the first aid kit

"We'll leave these agents here, and _we'll_ head home" Liam picked Puck up, holding him firmly, but he didn't fight, growling warningly at the agents, who immediately contrived to look busy as Liam took Puck to the car

* * *

"Sir" they were greeted at the door by a butler, who lost his smile abruptly when he was pinned by twin glares from the two males "we uh-this was delivered" he handed it to Liam, who cleared his throat. Puck looked suspiciously at him. That had sounded like a _laugh_. He read the note aloud

_Rachel has been taken and locked in my castle_

_From_

_The big bad giant_

He looked seriously at Puck "what do you-whoa!" Puck jumped out of his arms, running full pelt back down the drive and jumping into the car

"Finn's house" he snarled. Liam caught up quickly and the driver, at Liam's nod, drove off, with Puck pushing him every few seconds to go faster. When they reached the Hudson residence, Puck jumped out of the car before it stopped and charged into Finn, who was playing with his pet dog in the front garden

"Where's Rachel?" he snarled into the terrified face of the bigger boy. Finn screwed his eyes shut and whimpered

"Maybe asking slightly more pleasantly would allow him the confidence to reply" Liam suggested, peeling Puck's strong fingers from around Finn's neck and pulling him away, this time struggling violently

"I didn't want to do it!" Finn promised "it wasn't my idea! Don't kill me! She's in the old castle near the forest!" he scrambled to his feet and ran inside without looking back. Puck lunged at the puppy dog from Liam's arms and the dog whined and ran after its master, tail between its legs

"I guess we're heading to the old castle?" Liam asked calmly

"Duh!" Puck growled, struggling every step of the way back to the car "put-me-_down!_"

"The old castle" Liam told the driver, finally letting go of Puck as he got back into the car

Puck didn't bother with preliminaries; he ran full-pelt _in_ to the old door, which gave way under the force of his supernatural anger-uh, _power_. He went with the momentum and flew down the derelict hallway and crashed through the doorway at the end, the suspiciously new-looking lock snapping like a twig

"Oh _Noah_!" Rachel, dressed in full damsel garb jumped up from a neat picnic set and turned her brightest smile on him "I _knew_ you'd rescue me if I was kidnapped-and you're so strong, my fair rescuer" Puck glowered as she clasped her hands together

"Did Hudson do this?" he growled

"Well, no…I did" Rachel admitted "but I wanted to play fairy tales and you wouldn't!" she stomped her foot for effect

"You could've warned me" Puck rolled his eyes, breathing a sigh of relief "and don't call me Noah" he frowned "it's not badass"

"Noah is a much more _princely_ name than Puck" Rachel informed him "and you played the part of the handsome prince _excellently_" she congratulated him

"I wasn't being a handsome prince" he informed her, taking her hand and dragging her back the way he'd come to where Liam was waiting at the castle entrance "I was _being_ a badass vampire"

"Handsome prince" Rachel muttered

"Badass vampire with badass hearing" he scowled "I can't believe you pretended to be kidnapped. If I wasn't so badass, I would have been _scared_"

"You were _scared_ for me?" Rachel asked excitedly

"No" Puck snorted. Liam coughed to hide his laughter "I'm badass, so I wasn't. But if I _had_ been a lame human prince I probably would have been scared"

"Thank you for rescuing me" Rachel hugged him as they reached the car "and for playing, even if you didn't mean to. And I'm sorry for _nearly_ scaring you"

"It's ok I guess" Puck sighed heavily "I'm just really hungry. Rescuing is hard work"

"Do you need to bite me?" she asked seriously

"That would probably help" he nodded seriously "But I think I also need pie. And cookies. Chocolate ones. And I might eat Finn's dog. Because he knew where you were and didn't want to tell me"

"He was supposed to tell you straight away" Rachel assured him

"That would have been difficult" Liam told her as he helped them into the back of the car "since Puck was choking him"

"He deserved it" Puck muttered "also, your stupid game cost me a second ice cream. So I'll need to bite you, then I need pie, cookies and another ice cream" he said seriously

"But that was Rachel's ice cream" Liam pointed out

"That she gave to _me_" Puck rolled his eyes at the simpleton "it was a _gift_. So I need another one so I don't upset Rachel for throwing away her present"

"You threw it away?" she stared at him "but you love ice cream"

"You were missing and I was sc-I thought you'd be scared" Puck told her "so...next time, can I at least dress up like a superhero?"

"Next time?" Rachel beamed and Puck just shrugged "maybe I could let you choose the next scenario..."

* * *

**There it is-Puckleberry's Fairy Tale. The end feels a little...rushed or not done, but as I said at the top-I struggled with this one; half of it was written in anger phase...so it's not my best work.**

**But hopefully, you enjoyed it anyway-please let me know! [please, please, please!] and while I'm happily watching the Puckleberry duet again and again and again and again and-you get the point- I like the bit where Rachel pulls him away from the intruders after his verse the most I think; it's a super cute part :] –anyway, while I'm doing that, I will try and start on the next chapter. I'll try my best-est.**

**And any ideas for future chapters are still welcomed. And I am working on the High School bit. I even have most of the first part done, I swear, I just can't decided how/where to leave it...**


	6. Itty Bitty Secrets: Part the first

**I know-I'm an awful person; I said I'd work on this chapter...but I've kind of gone off Glee-I'm on a Vampire Diaries kick atm. Mmmmm Damon... But without further ado-this is the next instalment of out Itty Bitty Adventures; Secrets: Part I**

**Disclaimer: Glee does not belong to me, blah, blah, blah**

* * *

Rachel stared at the calendar in the Puckerman kitchen. It was Puck's birthday next Saturday and he _hadn't told her_. She only had a _week_ to find him a present, make everybody else she knew buy him a present, find a Super Mario cake, organise a _nice _theme for a party and find a pretty new dress. How very irresponsible of him. She sighed heavily and the adults fell silent, turning to her

"What's wrong honey?" Puck's mother asked

"Um" she looked quickly around the room "I'm listening and being good and quiet and Puck has _fallen asleep_" she pointed accusingly at the sleeping form of her mate, slumped on the table. Liam growled softly and knocked his fist next to Puck's head sharply. The young vampire woke with a snarl

"This is for _you_, this conversation, vampire" Liam scolded "so _listen_" Puck glared suspiciously at Rachel, who turned her head with a sniff; he hadn't told her about his birthday, she was hardly the one in the wrong.

"I _was_" Puck insisted vehemently "you were talking about...security?" he guessed

"Nice guess" Liam said dryly "and as it happened, we were"

"Well what's to know?" Puck yawned "nobody is allowed near Rachel apart from me, and if anybody does go near her, I bite them"

"Indeed" Liam sighed "it's _that_ simple" he fought the urge to roll his eyes

"It is" Puck scowled "it's worked up to now" he pointed out "when _your_ security didn't" he smirked and Liam's eyes flashed black. He didn't appreciate being goaded by an annoying child. Especially when he was irritatingly _good_ at it

* * *

"Where's Puck?" Santana asked. Everybody turned and stared at the door as Rachel came in..._alone_

"He's talking to Miss Willow" Rachel glanced back, then faced her class "I need your help-all of you. Puck's birthday is on Saturday and he hasn't told me, so I have to organise everything as a surprise. we are going to have a party, you are all coming and you have to all get him a present...and you have to help keep him away from me this week sometimes while I organise everything with Liam"

"Keep Puck away from you?" Mr Schuester was the only one to speak up "I'm...not sure that's a good idea Rachel-Puck gets quite _violently_ protective of you" he pointed out cautiously

"It's his _birthday_ Mr Schuester" Rachel gave a long-suffering sigh "but _fine_, if _you_ won't help me, I shall do it all myself" she looked around the class "well? _Anybody?_" nobody was forthcoming "can I _at least_ expect you all to attend on Saturday with gifts?" she rolled her eyes

"I'll help" Santana stepped forward "if Puck tries anything I can fly up high" she shrugged

"Me too" Brittany skipped over to hold Santana's hand and beam at Rachel "I like birthdays"

"Thank you" Rachel smiled, relieved; it would be too much to do on her own in a week "now _everybody_ remember this is a _secret_"

When Puck stomped in a while later, muttering darkly about 'stupid grownups that didn't know _nothing_' and headed straight for Rachel...only Brittany jumped in front of him and started chatting about her pet unicorn. Puck looked past her to Rachel. She was sitting with Santana working hard and Finn wasn't nearby-she was safe, and shoving Brittany just wasn't right. She was like his baby sister-completely innocent and defenceless. And she didn't mean any harm. So he listened with half an ear and agreed unicorns could exist-hey, if shape shifters, witches, vampires and _Rachel_ existed, then there was no reason unicorns couldn't

"You really think so?" Brittany asked excitedly

"Sure" Puck shrugged "maybe you should ask Liam, when he picks us up this afternoon" he suggested mischievously "he's been around _forever_; if there are unicorns he'll probably know. _In fact_" his eyes lit up "you should draw him a picture of what you think unicorns look like, and have him look at it-see if it's realistic"

"Oh, I _will_" Brittany ran off to the art table excitedly. Puck snickered-served Liam right for snitching to Miss Willow about his use of the gone-off milk cartons in his recreation of a war with the sixth graders. Apparently soaking 'unsuspecting innocent bystanders' in the smelly, coagulated liquid was _irresponsible_ and _childish_ [well _duh_; he was a child!] and _dangerous_. He didn't agree with that at all-who drank gone off milk? And if that cat-shifter had been stupid enough to drink the stuff when it smelt that foul, she deserved to be sick. Apparently that wasn't a 'good attitude' and had landed him an even longer lecture while Liam stood over him and nodded along with Miss Willow's scolding.

Brittany taken care of, he moved over to Rachel. Santana snatched the work out of Rachel's hands and Rachel took Puck's hand before he could snatch it back

"Noah..." he frowned at the use of his name. Nothing good ever followed that. "when he saw you weren't here...Finn tried to make me play with him" she gave him her best wide, innocent-eyes look. His fangs elongated and he growled "and he tried to _hug_ me" Rachel finished, hiding a smile. Puck stormed off to find the half-giant and Rachel turned back to Santana and the work

"He should have offered to help" she told the harpy with a smirk identical to Puck's "now he will, completely unintentionally"

"You're so mean" Santana sighed "I'm so jealous"

"What made you think you could talk to Rachel?" Puck demanded planting himself in front of Finn, Matt jumping out of the way in the face of the vampire's obvious ire

"I didn't" Finn shook his head frantically, looking around for Mr Schuester. He was too young to die!

"So Rachel's a _liar?_" Puck challenged

"N-no, but-" Finn's eyes went wide "Help! Somebody help me! He's going to kill me!" he turned tail and ran, weaving clumsily around the tables, knocking over almost everything in his path-including other children, toys, chairs and a couple of the smaller tables. Mr Schuester was nowhere to be found, and Finn moved to the only person who could stop a Puck attack

"Rachel-_Nooooo!_" Puck jumped him as soon as his feet moved in Rachel's direction and both boys went crashing into the craft cupboard. The old piece of furniture wasn't up for vampire strength, much less when combined with the full weight of a young half-giant and it crumpled like a newspaper, emptying paper, card, pipe cleaners, cotton wool, crayons and pots of paint and glue onto the two boys. An out of breath Mr Schuester burst back into the classroom just in time to pull Puck away from the dazed Finn

"He tried to touch Rachel" Puck scowled "he knows the rules"

"But I _didn't!_" Finn insisted

"Either you did, or you're calling Rachel a liar" Puck shrugged out of Mr Schuester's grip and glowered at his adversary challengingly

"Bu-" Finn flicked a glance at Rachel and Puck growled

"He _did_ do it" Santana piped up "that's why I sat with Rachel, to protect her while you weren't here" she smiled with the innocence of a demon, but Puck didn't care-that was _proof_. He lunged and Finn jumped back while Mr Schuester grabbed for Puck, holding on tight and carrying him-kicking and snarling-from the classroom

"Don't worry Puck-I'll protect her!" Santana promised as the door closed behind the furious vampire and their teacher.

* * *

"If you continue to misbehave, you'll be sending the week in isolation without Rachel" Mr Schuester threatened. Puck went still and let the relieved teacher take him to the councillors office. Puck groaned as Miss Pillsbury's office came into sight. The nervous woman was every reason that Rachel got so offended when people thought she was a fairy-and she was _terrified_ of Puck and his fangs

"Sorry Emma" Mr Schuester gave her a soft smile as he entered the office "I think we need to have a chat with Puck about the _correct_ way of resolving problems with his classmates. I'll ring his mother and Mr Dohullehn"

"Oh _great_" Puck sighed "_another_ talk from Liam. You know he isn't going to want to come in, and ma cant. She's looking after the _baby_"

He was right. Liam picked up the phone asking what he'd done _now_ resignedly, but growled his consent to being there-telling them not to bother with Puck's mother; she was busy with the baby-Puck smirked smugly-and he would pass on Puck's list of crimes in the weekly report to her. That got an eye roll from the vampire; his mother already thought he was a lost cause-she just hoped he wouldn't corrupt 'that lovely Rachel girl'.

Puck sat in the office, coughing every time Mr Schuester went to talk to Miss Pillsbury which was doubly amusing. Not only was he annoying Finn-loving Schuester, but he was also terrifying Miss Pillsbury, who he knew was dying to break out a face mask for protection.

* * *

While Rachel, Santana, Brittany and Quinn-who'd changed her mind about helping when Rachel started talking about princess dresses-discussed the best way to keep the party girl-friendly but still have Puck's precious Super Mario as the main attraction, Puck sat and sulked in Miss Pillsbury's office as he was hit with a three-pronged attack about responsible use of his powers, trusting his classmates and resolving arguments without his fangs and fists.

"You know one day Puck" Liam sighed as they left the office just before lunch "_just_ once, could we go a week without me being called in to deal with you?"

"Well Liam" he replied seriously "that would be more than one day" and he ran off to the classroom at full speed, leaving a growling Liam to leave the school in an even worse mood than when he'd arrived.

The group of four girls broke up as soon as he entered, and Rachel gave Santana the notes to look after as Puck made his way straight to her

"We'll do more tomorrow" she promised the girls as she was dragged off to feed him _properly_ before he filled up on pie at school-lunchtime.

* * *

**So there we have it-I may do more of the week and Rachel's prep or skip straight to Puck's actual birthday for the next bit. We'll see. But if you like, I can give Brittany her scene with Liam. I couldn't find a proper ending for the chapter, so I left it there because to make you wait **_**even longer**_** for it would just be mean-and there's no guarantee I'd find a real ending...**

**Anywhoooooo; for those of you who are interested, the first chapter of Itty Bitty in High School is up now too-ingeniously called 'Growing Up: Itty Bitty Puckleberry in High School'-neat huh? Lol. So, check it out and feed back!**

**Also-as a completely weird side note, there's a saying that's been **_**killing**_** me the last 24 hours. When somebody is injured in the line of duty, they can say 'just a _ of the job'. Opposite of a job perk; like a hazard, risk or consequence, only not those words. **_**Please**_** if somebody can fill in the blank let me know. It's driving me bat-shit.**

**Ta very much. And I hope you enjoyed the story! Let me know that too!**


	7. Puck's Revenge and Unicorns

**OK…I know. I'm an awful person. I actually had most of this typed up when I put the last chapter up but since then…I've just gone off Glee. I haven't watched ANY since…well, when I last updated**

**Special thanks go to Ophelia*****, whose message was the straw that broke the camel's back and it got me back here. so sorry for taking so long and I hope it's at least a little bit worth the wait!**

**(named and shamed – sorry! If you don't like I can delete)**

**Also, thank you for everybody who read the Growing Up: High School version and reviewed/favourited/alerted-seems lots and lots of you are enjoying which is of the good!**

**This chapter is for the people who reviewed both stories :]Enjoy!**

**Also, for those who wanted the Brittany/Liam scene. I wanted it too :]**

**Disclaimer: The laptop this story was typed on is mine. And Liam-he's mine too. If Glee were mine it would be way better. Vampires are way sexier than the Glee kids …**

* * *

"Hi Mr Liam!" Brittany skipped over and Puck kept hold of Rachel's hand as he talked to Mike and Matt so Liam couldn't use her as an escape tactic. Revenge was _sweet_.

"Hello Brittany" Liam smiled gently at the little angel and looked for Puck and Rachel. Brittany was sweet, but patience wasn't one of _his_ virtues

"I was talking to Puck earlier" Liam glanced down at her. _Oh no_. "and I asked if unicorns are real-I did want to know, but I had to detract him for Rachel" Liam blinked; oh-_dis_tract. He'd forgotten about that. _He_ had no wish to give Puck the run of the place on his birthday "and even though I know he didn't care" Brittany chattered "he agrees that maybe unicorns _are_ real, but we thought _you'd_ know for sure, because you're way old and you've seen everything. And if they are real, do you think I could ride them, like at mommy's stables? She doesn't have unicorns and she's never seen one, but she said they might be real, and Puck said they might be real, and I _want_ them to be real, so have you ever seen a unicorn Mr. Liam?" she looked at him with such hope Liam found himself caving even as he _knew_ this would get completely out of hand

"Well...yes, I have" he admitted heavily. Brittany squealed and Liam winced as the piercing sound abused his sensitive ears. He was going to choke the vampire. It might not kill Puck, but it would definitely make Liam feel better

"Where? When? What did it look like? Do they eat rainbows?" Brittany jumped up and down "Can I meet some? Can I? Can I? Oh, oh, do they look like _this?_" she scrambled in her bag for a moment and Liam looked around for his charges. Rachel was standing beside Puck, who was faced determinedly _away_ from the school exit, talking to Matt and Mike. The damned vamp had set him up. _Again_. Out manoeuvred by a Brittany jumped up and down, waving a piece of paper and Liam took it and had to cover his laugh with a cough

"Well, uh, actually Brittany" Liam hesitated "well, what does yours have that a normal horse doesn't?" he asked tactfully

"It's right there" the blonde pointed to the paper with a frown "a rainbow on its back, and four horns and sparkles and a magic wand and a pet fairy and a dress" she looked up at him with a smile "is that what they look like?"

"Ah" Liam scratched his head "not..._exactly_" they were _horns?!_ "unicorns only have one horn, and it protru-uh, _sticks out_ just above their eyes, right here" he showed her on the picture "and they don't eat rainbows...or have them as saddles-on their backs" he clarified at her blank look

"That's not a saddle, that's a _seat_" Brittany rolled her eyes "_all_ horses have seats on their back"

"Seats. Of course" Liam mentally added another ten minutes to the choking "well unicorns _don't_ have seats on their backs; they don't like people trying to ride them. They also don't have magic wands, dresses or uh-pet fairies" he smiled apologetically "sorry"

"What about pet Angels?" Brittany asked eagerly

"They don't keep pets" Liam told her gently

"So a unicorn wouldn't want me?" Brittany's eyes filled with tears and her lower lip trembled "but I've always wanted to live with unicorns!"

"You could keep a pet unicorn instead" Liam told her desperately

"Really?" all trace of sadness and tears disappointed "will you get me one?" she bounced excitedly "a pink one. A pink _sparkly_ one called Brittany-Unicorn"

* * *

"Noah" Rachel tugged on his hand insistently until he turned to her with a martyred sigh

"_What_, Rachel?"

"Liam is waiting for us" Rachel frowned "we have to go home"

"Well…" Punk looked over and saw Brittany had the pictures out and he snickered "alright" he agreed, ignoring Rachel's questioning look and smiling innocently. Rachel opened her mouth "let's go home" he tugged her towards Liam "Liam's waiting Rae"

"No-_ahhh_?" Rachel started as they made their way across the playground, her wings turning pink. Puck eyed them suspiciously

"What's up Rachel?" he asked

"Will you come over and play this weekend?" she smiled brightly at him

"I always spend the weekend with you playing" Puck shrugged "so yeah, of course. Mom's busy with the baby anyway"

* * *

"Liam! Liam! Liam! Liam!" Rachel skipped across the playground. Puck _jogged_ alongside her

"Rachel" Liam gave her a relieved smile "and _Puck_" the young vampire stuck his tongue out at him. Liam growled and Rachel looked alarmed

"Liam?" she wrapped an arm around one of his legs, looking up at him with wide, worried eyes as her wing tips turned dark grey

"Sorry Rachel" Liam forced down his inner hell hound "we need to get home"

"We're ready" she nodded but didn't let go of him. Puck eyed the leg his wife was wrapped around and pressed his tongue against the tip of a fang casually. Liam bent and picked the pair of them up, holding Puck tighter than was technically necessary. Puck squirmed but Liam tightened his grip. Puck growled softly and nipped his teeth together threateningly. Liam ignored him

"I'm _really_ sorry Brittany" he forced a smile for the girl "I have to get these two home"

"Ok" Brittany pouted "hey Rachel, will there be any unicorns at-"

"Bye Brittany!" Rachel said loudly, glaring at the suddenly wide eyed girl

"Sorry Rachel" she winced "bye" she waved at the trio and ran off as Puck opened his mouth

"What was that about?" he demanded of Rachel

"Guess what, Liam?" Rachel chirped happily "Puck said he'd spend the _whole weekend_ with me!"

"Oh…yay" Puck yelped as Liam's grip threatened to crush his ribs "the whole weekend" the hound muttered, striding for the car "can't wait"

* * *

**So…can't really apologise enough for the horrendous delay. I got reviews occasionally pleading for updates and I really did have most of this written. But now I've finished Day One!**

**I will do my best to churn out more this weekend.**

**Super duper sorry to everyone who's been waiting forever for this. Hopefully you at least enjoyed it - what there is of it - this is quite short. More apologies**

**Seriously. This weekend. I'll do something. I will write myself a reminder to do so now.**

**And sorry. Again.**

**Also, constructive criticism is welcome. Hostility will either be ignored or returned double-barrelled. I haven't decided yet. So please don't be mean! I'll blow raspberries at the screen if you are. That'll teach you…hypothetically…**


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